I was a jolly mess…



I carried books inside me

They protected me like weapons




against all the fake disgusting people of the world



A good book made me feel like I existed,

Made me feel safe,



nothing could hurt me



I was weird, abstract, and self absorbed


often, trapped in a senseless corner of my mind

weeks went by,



every hour I wasted in a classroom,

listening to professors,

I accumulated debt




I hated my courses, drank heavily, got mixed up

needed to escape




Chemicals worked temporarily,

but I hated the return to reality



so I cut my losses and left that place,

the institution could keep their fines and fees,

essays and fat textbooks








I would find another way




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